The Plumber, the Koopa, and the Green Pipe
by Omegilla
Summary: In Brooklyn New York, two brothers, Mario and Luigi Segale run a small business in the downtown parts. Life goes as normal until one day they are contracted for work in the sewers, where they find themselves with more then they first imagined.


**Chronicles of Mushroom Kingdom: The Plumber, the Koopa, and the Green Pipe.**

_Chapter 1: Well, You're the Greasemonkey._

_Brooklyn, New York, at 11:23 AM on June 12th, 2003_

"Okay, look, if we get this done today, then its just one less chore to do tomorrow." He looked down at his brother scrutinizingly, heaving with a sigh at the total procrastination. His voice carried all throughout the small mechanic's garage, bouncing off the cars suspended on the lifts and every cement wall. It was _that_ day again, Luigi knew. The day he'd seen coming for months. Every year, Mario would sit around moping. It was understandable, even justified; who really could go around cheerfully working on the anniversary of their father's death?

Still, business was to be had, and they'd only be dishonoring their father by crying over him every year, and Luigi wasn't about to start only 3 years after it.

"Come on, bro. Lighten up, we got crap to do!" Luigi tried to shake him out of it, bumping Mario into the tool cabinet. "You can't sit here forever. Pauline's gonna be here in a few hours. Ya want to be looking fine for her, don't ya?"

Luigi tried to sound more diplomatic in tone, but it seemed to have little effect. Mario looked up at him and spoke slowly, "Luigi, can't I just have one day to myself? One day of mourning?"

Luigi frowned. He didn't want to confront his brother on it all. Luigi had half a mind to weep openly himself, but he knew Dad would just slap them both and give thema_ real_ reason to cry, as he'd say. Business was bad enough as it was, and someone had to be the stickler. It pained him to be the one to start confrontation, but he did so anyway,

"No. You can't. We got to do this! If Pauline's car isn't done today, shes gonna have a fit, she isn't gonna pay us and you know she'll blame me!" Luigi began to get that slightly whiny tone in his voice, but Mario didn't react to it. He sighed then, nodding his head, his wavy moustache bouncing as he lifted his head to face his brother. "Yeah, I guess your right, bro..."

It was only a few hours later when they finally had the car in running order. The battery had partially melted along with most of the sprockets being loose, keeping the engine from running properly. It was the usual deal with Pauline's car. She was a nightmare. Any car she ever brought in that was so bad in shape, they knew Pauline had been behind the wheel, even if the damage didn't make sense. Speaking of the devil, she was there soon enough.

A yellow car dropped in by the garage, the taxi-man sticking his head out through the passenger-side window. "Yep, thats the place, 'Antonio and Son's' right darlin'?" The taxi-man brought his head back inside, and the backseat door opened. From within came a tough looking woman. A woman who produced multiple terrible and wondrous feelings. She was sexy, but her tattooed body betrayed her obvious violent, "resist the man" attitude. Her dark eyeliner showed she enjoyed the nightlife more then most anything. With her short, black-died hair and purple-painted lips, she strolled over to the garage in her black leather high-heel boots. When she entered, she spat out a piece of gum she had been chewing, aiming for the nearby trashcan, and missing it from 2 feet away. The saliva oozed onto the wall, and Luigi winced in a germo-phobic spasm.

"So where's ma' car?" She spoke with a very outside voice in the very inside-voice sensitive garage, her voice then amplified by the echoes. Mario seemed to lighten up at the sight of this, however.

Luigi then looked to Pauline nervously, "Well, its right over there, Pauline." Luigi adopted his natural domicile, low voice persona, even trying to add a respectful tone to it to avoid any possible aggravation, and pointed to the ruby-red car sitting down a short ways, infront of the second garage-door, ready to go.

Pauline smiled slightly, "Thank ya', boys. I can always count on ya'." She then walked over to the speechless Mario, and while towering over the short man, landed a kiss on his lips. Mario fluttered slightly, watching her leave.

As Pauline got in her car, she turned back to the brothers in a slightly bombastic fashion, "Anyways, I hope you two make it to the party." She winked to Mario, and then watched the garage door open as she was speaking, since Luigi knew if he didn't open it soon enough she'd just as soom ram through it.

"Isn't she wonderful?" Mario asked Luigi. Luigi shook his head at him solemnly,

"What do you see in her? The only reason she's even interested in you is because you saved her from that stupid ape who had that penchant for tossing barrels back in high school. Classic 'Nightingale Syndrome.'"

Mario glared at him, "And? She may not be the nicest person around but shes probably the cleanest gal you could meet in a place like Brooklyn!"

He awaited a response he knew wouldn't come. Luigi, naturally, stepped away from a argumentative tone, "I'm just saying, she isn't one of the nice ones." Luigi tried to avoid the matter-of-fact tone, but it nonetheless came out. He had to try to speak with a certain authority, else his brother wouldn't listen to him.

Mario groaned slightly "Well its not like you'd know. Your the shut-in." Mario returned swiftly, and somewhat true. Luigi really was more of the accountant of the duo. Balanced checks, did the taxes, or at least, sales tax... and most importantly, handled business calls.

But Luigi wouldn't give in so easily, and struck Mario back with an uncharacteristic slam, "Yeah, well, your the greasemonkey. Not like you'd know either!"

Mario glared at him, and walked away a few inches. He then stooped over near a wall, and picked something up. It was the gum. It was Pauline's spit covered gum. He smirked when he looked at Luigi, and Luigi returned with a grimace.

"Mario, don't you dare." Luigi attempted once more to sound authoritative, and even forewarning, but it did little. Mario chucked it straight for Luigi's head. Luigi squealed, ducking.

He stood back up, giving a short laugh, "Ha! You missed me!" But he frowned, confused, and Mario smiled and pointed behind him. Luigi, however quick he was, as he found out, left his own possessions at risk when he had ducked, as the gum had struck Luigi's special green cap that he had laid on the toolbox behind him.

Luigi then took a look of horror upon his face. "Mario! Ee-I-eww..." Luigi simply shuddered, turning to Mario with a blaze in his eye. "You know how I hate germs." Mario raised an eyebrow at him innocently. "Why do you think I did it then?" With that, Mario walked off, satisfied.


End file.
